Trump Offers Pelosi $130,000 to Keep Quiet

Photograph by Brendan Smialowski / AFP / Getty

WASHINGTON (The Borowitz Report)—In an indication that he has reached his breaking point with the Speaker of the House, Donald J. Trump is offering a hundred and thirty thousand dollars to keep Nancy Pelosi quiet, White House aides confirmed on Thursday.

According to those aides, Trump floated the idea of a six-figure payment to silence Pelosi during a…


  1. Wouldn’t that be bribery, he never worked a day in his life and don’t know what it means to do physical labor to get grease and dirt under his finger nails, all he cares about is lining his pockets with money, he has no compassion for the families and the seniors or all the people affected by his shut down, what would he do if people were dying as a result of his shut down, he didn’t care about the children who died at the border, why would he care about anyone else.

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