Tag: Walmart

CEO Doug McMillon says Walmart will end all sales of handguns in Alaksa and discontinue the sale of short-barreled rifles and handgun ammunition nationwide; Matt Finn reports from Chicago. #FoxNews FOX News operates the FOX News Channel (FNC), FOX Business…

JAMES LAWLER DUGGAN / Reuters 1. Thou shall not covet thy neighbor’s wife. Thou shall covet thy neighbor’s daughter, especially that one who works the register at Bath & Body Works after school lets out. Thou shall park way over at the Walmart so the overzealous mall cops won’t “run the plate” again. Thou shall fill thy pockets with bountiful gift certificates to Justice, Aeropostale, Forever 21 and Claire’s. Speaking of which, why isn’t there a store called “Forever Under 21”? Between the cellphone case bejewler kiosk and Bath & Body Works thou shall brandish a bag full of Wetzel’s Pretzel Pizza Bitzes and moan, “Oh, these Wetzel’s Pretzel Pizza Bitzes are so delicious but I can’t possibly finish all these alone.” 7. Thou shall renew thy subscription to Seventeen to stay up on fresh lines like, “Hey, bae, where’s the rest of your squad?” 8. Why isn’t there a magazine called Under Seventeen? Breath mints.

JAMES LAWLER DUGGAN / Reuters 1. Thou shall not covet thy neighbor’s wife. Thou shall covet thy neighbor’s daughter, especially that one who works the register at Bath & Body Works after school lets out. Thou shall park way over at the Walmart so the overzealous mall cops won’t “run the plate” again. Thou shall fill thy pockets with bountiful gift certificates to Justice, Aeropostale, Forever 21 and Claire’s. Speaking of which, why isn’t there a store called “Forever Under 21”? Between the cellphone case bejewler kiosk and Bath & Body Works thou shall brandish a bag full of Wetzel’s Pretzel Pizza Bitzes and moan, “Oh, these Wetzel’s Pretzel Pizza Bitzes are so delicious but I can’t possibly finish all these alone.” 7. Thou shall renew thy subscription to Seventeen to stay up on fresh lines like, “Hey, bae, where’s the rest of your squad?” 8. Why isn’t there a magazine called Under Seventeen? Breath mints.

Seth Meyers' monologue from Thursday, December 14. » Subscribe to Late Night: http://bit.ly/LateNightSeth » Get more Late Night with Seth Meyers: http://www.nbc.com/late-night-with-seth-meyers/ » Watch Late Night with Seth Meyers Weeknights 12:35/11:35c on NBC. LATE NIGHT ON SOCIAL Follow Late Night on Twitter: https://twitter.com/LateNightSeth…