Tag: Typing

Conservative MPs are concerned for the mental health of Prime Minister Theresa May after she was found obsessively typing ‘All work and no Brexit makes Theresa a dull girl.’ Theresa was found in her office, with hundreds of stacks of the same line hand-typed over and over. ‘And she had that thousand-yard stare too. Like she was about to go “Full Metal Jacket”. It was the scariest thing I’ve seen in my political career other than Boris Johnson’s nip slip last summer,’ said one anonymous Conservative MP. The mental breakdown comes on the back of May suffering the largest parliamentary defeat of any prime minister in modern time over her proposed Brexit deal. Despite the worrying behaviour, the PM is back in the House of Commons today. She has been overheard muttering to herself her intentions to ‘correct’ the MPs who voted against her. Theresa has been praised for her resilience, with one Conservative MP calling her a ‘shining example of a selfless leader.’