Tag: Three-peat

Steve Bannon’s local liquor store posts record profits for third consecutive quarter. The economy continues to strengthen under Donald Trump’s presidency after Steve Bannon’s local liquor store posted record profits for the third consecutive quarter. The liquor store, which is located within staggering distance of Steve Bannon’s home, is making money ‘hand over fist’ thanks to the drinking habits of Trump’s former advisor. ‘He’s by far our best customer,’ said store owner Sadiq Ali, 42. ‘And he’s drinking more than ever since he got laid off by Trump.’ It’s believed that Steve Bannon personally accounts for almost 90% of the liquor store’s net profits. While Bannon might not typically care for Muslims, he has no issues with laying down his money at Mr Ali’s establishment. ‘He’s always very nice and polite to my face. He calls this his happy place,’ said Mr Ali. The liquor store is making enough money that Mr Ali can afford health insurance for himself and all his family as well as putting all four of his children through college. Steve Bannon has denied that all the alcohol purchased was for his own personal consumption, calling allegations of alcoholism a ‘slur’ against his good name.