Pence Begs Trump Not to Make Him Sit Next to Woman at State of the Union

Photograph by Chip Somodevilla / Getty

WASHINGTON (The Borowitz Report)—Vice-President Mike Pence has begged Donald J. Trump not to make him sit next to a woman during Tuesday night’s State of the Union address, sources confirmed on Monday.

According to those sources, an emotional Pence came close to breaking down in tears as he explained…

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